Thank you

Just two little words.....
"thank you"
But those two little words mean alot especially when they are heart felt.

Scenario: Little G has her first illness. Husband was sick on Christmas with a horrible cold that is making the rounds.
Three days ago little G started with it.
She is such a pleasant child.
No whining.
No crying.
Just lots of mucus and snuggle time.
You know she isnt well when she isnt moving constantly!
She woke up from her nap early today- another sign that she is not herself.(as well as not eating with her usual gusto!)
I fixed her a cup of juice to which she jumped up and down squealing and signing "juice! Juice!" I can tell exactly what she is signing without looking because I know her so well..... the sound is like "vwhoosh vwhoosh". I put some cheese-its in her cute Ikea bowl and sat her in her beanbag to watch Sesame street. She got done with her snack and brought me the empty bowl.
Went back
watched a few mins
only to turn around
come back to sign
"thank you".
Brought tears to my eyes.
She was thanking me for her snack.
HUGE!!

Scenario 2:
right before bed,
prayers are said/signed
a book is read
I tell her "I love you! I love my little G!"
as I press the sign I love you onto her heart.
She signed it back to me......
she cant hold the pinky up with the other fingers
but
I knew
she was telling me
she loved me.......



I am so blessed.
I am humbled daily.....
This is just so beautiful.

Oh, before I close for the night.... Happy New Year!!!!

I remain,
Under His wings,
Anna

A quiet house????

I just want to say,
Its kinda funny when you post on Facebook, " the house is so quiet" - only to realize that your child has five, yes F-I-V-E toys playing sounds and music
all at once.....

My how things can change in a blink of an eye.
Last Christmas and this Years Christmas looked nothing alike. My Middle child has sprouted wings and flown out of the nest and proposed to his girlfriend and little G is home......
I wanted to pause from my knitting to post some pictures
We celebrated Christmas with our children on Sunday evening. Fried turkey, Corn casserole, mashed potatoes and green bean casserole. I made three kinds of cookies and husband made home made egg nog- another Alton Brown recipe. If youve never had it you should really give it a try.( This was without the burbon of course......)
My heart is full......
We are so thankful
for our home,
Our family and friends,
and the many many blessings God gives us daily.

Im closing today with a funny pic.....
Ive mentioned this before and actually had the camera to get a photo of it:
Little G is calling her Papa at work on the remote...... its the funniest thing!

A Quiet house

I just want to say,
Its kinda funny when you post on Facebook, " the house is so quiet" - only to realize that your child has five, yes F-I-V-E toys playing sounds and music at once.....

My how things can change in a blink of an eye.
Last Christmas and this Years Christmas looked nothing alike. My Middle child has sprouted wings and flown out of the nest and proposed to his girlfriend and little G is home......
I wanted to pause from my knitting to post some pictures
We celebrated Christmas with our children on Sunday evening. Fried turkey, Corn casserole, mashed potatoes and green bean casserole. I made three kinds of cookies and husband made home made egg nog- another Alton Brown recipe. If youve never had it you should really give it a try.( This was without the burbon of course......)
My heart is full......
We ae so thankful for our home,
Our family and friends,
and the many many blessings God gives us daily.

Im closing today with a funny pic.....
Ive mentioned this before and actually had the camera to get a photo of it:
Little G is calling her Papa at work on the remote...... its the funniest thing!

Christmas Eve

These two pictures were taken the first week in December when we went to see the lights in downtown Milton. Grace seems to be wondering how it can be so cold in Florida.......

This is my oldest daughter with little G. She and her husband volunteered and dressed up as Elves the first part of the month.....

Tuesday night we took the whole family to see the new Narnia movie. Was so much fun. I did a huge southern meal, fried cube steaks biscuits, veggies and white gravy before we went..... You shouldve heard G squealing with delight and signing at things she recognized during the movie. I hid her eyes during a scary part and it was so funny for her to sign scared and Grouchy at the sea monster when I wasnt quick enough!!! There were so many moments we were laughing at her antics.

Well.... papa isnt feeling well.
So we are home.
Not what I expected for Christmas Eve.
We usually go to candlelight service....
Had the dress, the tights, the hairbow......
Seems like all the traditions that I find security in have been stirred around and turned into something quite new. But I trust that it will still be Christmas with or without them! More years than not we have loaded up in the car and driven to my parents. (or his parents, or some years BOTH- with one family for part and the other for the rest!) But with our new addition and the serious work of "bonding" and "attaching" we decided early on that we would be home ALOT for at LEAST the next six months. it hasnt been easy. But we are dedicated to what is best for our sweet litle G..... and she is doing splendidly as a result.
We went to see a ship docked in the docks in Downtown Pensacola Thursday morning called the Peacemaker. Was beautiful. Grace kept signing "water" and "happy". It was a beautiful day.
No matter the sacrifices.
She is worth it.
Dear friends.
The waiting.....
Advent,
waiting for the arrival of Christ,
Christ in Christmas......
Leading up to a New Year and Lent.....
the sacrifice......
He looks at each one of us thinking the same thing I think when I see her......
"No matter what the cost......
You are loved,
You are wanted,
I want to be with you in eternity.
I want to have a real relationship with you.
You matter......."
He wanted us all to be adopted.....
grafted into the vine.....
A hope and a future......
My heart is full.
THIS is what Christmas eve looks like tonight.

Isnt it beautiful........

XXOO,
I remain Under His wings,
Anna

can we be friends?

I mentioned last week that little G has a little "friend" at church. This little girl is Gs age and has a uncle with Down Synrome. She asks her mom and grandma each Sunday if she can play with little G. Last Sunday it was so so sweet to watch the two little ones in their Sunday best playing ring around the rosie at the base of the Christmon tree.(her Grandma had a camera and took photos of them. I hope there was a good one or two.) I will remember to bring my camera to take lots of photos on Christmas eve.( I might even have to buy her a little gift..... "from little G".)
WHile I was watching them play and enjoying the moment my introspective self took over. I could see all the other little girls dressed in their best exchanging gifts and hugs and I wondered.
As time goes on the gap will grow.
It will become more and more obvious how behind she is..... what will it look like when all the other little girls graduate high school and go off to college, have boyfriends and get married?
Right now she can get away with being immature.
She looks small for her age.
Its not so obvious.
What does the future look like for G.
Will she have "friends"? Little girls that will enjoy her for who she is. Little Girls that will invite her to birthday parties and share secrets in the dark with and friends that will be there when we are gone?
Then I read this post today.
Just felt like I needed to share what was on my mind.

The "perfect" Christmas

My pastor is doing a series about the idea of having a "perfect" Christmas. Many of the topics have included loosing a job, financial hardships, Losing a loved one....... you know, we are living in the real world and its not going to be "perfect". Its been a very practical and appropriate topic.

It got me to thinking.....
I was looking at a nativity- I have a small collection.
I thought to myself," Did things go as Mary had planed?" She knew the child she was carrying was the Messiah. Do you think she expected to deliver her child in a stable? To lie THE MESSIAH in a manger? Please correct me if I am wrong. But I think that even the first Christmas wasnt "perfect" as we would think of what "perfect" looks like. What made the first Christmas "perfect" was that the Savior was part of it........

Thats all it takes.

I could be raised in faith
but there are still things that havent "clicked"......
I am glad that its new every day.

A good day... and some randomness

G and I went out with my Oldest daughter.
It was a beautiful day.
Started out just looking for a local that makes beautiful wood crafts.
Ended up at the Antique store and had a beautiful time.(they had handmade wooden cypress swings hanging outside) I dont know wht it is about antique shoppes but this just really hit "that spot".

Picked up son and made gingerbread cookies and iced them for Daughters students. (student teaching)

Got a bit of knitting done between batches.

Finished reading a great book I'm reviewing last night.......

Knit some more, the pattern changed and I realized I was off count and would have to rip all I had knit that hour. Put knitting down and went to bed. It was 2am so probably a good thing.

Been in a funk.( Making mental note to self to remember to take all the extra vitamins in the cabinet.) I think some of our experiences have really done something to my heart. Please forgive me if I am letting you down...... trying to figure out who I am.... still..... trying to sort out how you travel thousands of miles away and live a completely different lifestyle for two months, come home with a new daughter and remain the same person you were. I get the fact that I am probably not supposed to be "her " anymore. But I have to figure out how to be "me". We always kept Christmas low key. We had a real hard financial time and realized some great things. But this year it feels even more "different"....

I got to the post office with daughter yesterday. Had been on my to-do list for two weeks.... to mail my mother my old cell, she dropped hers while shutting tailgate of the truck......crunch..... needless to say.... no cell phone.......was thankful after a half hour standing in line that I had 11 stamps in my wallet, because the card machine was broken and the reason for the wait. God is so faithful......

So Im just wondering.....

Did I loose two months of my life?
The calendar still reads November on the fridge(write on wipe off one)
The one on the wall is still showing June (thats when we flew to Ecuador)
Is that why my Brain feels like I am stuck somewhere else.
Did I expect things to stop without me and pick back up when I got home.....
I am going through the motions and just not getting where I need to be.

I have been getting alot of pleasure out of my knitting.

I was watching G eat her cereal with her red and green plaid pjs on and thought to self. I bought those after season in Jan of 2008 for Dec of 2009...... just knew shed be home by then. My heart smiled to see the little bare feet swinging uner the table. Her Gymboree things in 3T still fit. I pulled the tags off the winter stuff that we didnt take to Ecuador........ enjoyed seeing her wearing the cute things that waited so long in the closet.... amazed they fit. She is saying so much and signing like crazy........ I want to video her signing a song...... mind boggling.
where we were.......
where we are......

On another note.
Recieved a phone call Monday.
Ive been asked to Mentor a youg lady in the foster care system that was recently released from detention. She has an interest in Art. I accepted the offer and will meet her after the first of the year.

In laws called yesterday and wont be coming on Monday for Christmas.
He is too sick to travel..... sigh....

Off to knit.
well un-knit.
THEN knit.

Monday catch up kind of post.....

WIth not being on the computer for the weekend it leaves Monday while little G is napping as catch up time......
We had a little warm front come through on Saturday and little G snuck outside while husband was busy. I had started a very special knitting project (after making mysef cast off two completed projects)and was still in my pjs.
I scrambled into something more appropriate and joined her.......
She had such a great time signing and saying "happy" appy.... appy appy apppy. Was SO SO cute as she toddled around. I had brought a plastic rainstick toy and her small dora ball for her to hit around the yard. She would kick it and sign "again" and before the end of playtime was actually saying something pretty close to again! We have a swing hanging in the back yard and the two of us took a break and enjoyed the warmth. She then "said"/ signed. "Again, Ball, down...." so I immediately helped her down as we were off playing with the improvised bat and ball. HUGE- three words to communicate a thought.
I have mentioned that she has gotten a little more opinionated about how and when she likes things havent I? Well, she started throwing the ball overhand and I asked her to look at what she was doing. Repeating myself over and over as she squinted her eyes and turned her head to the side. English, spanish... didnt matter. She was going to do it her way. I tried putting my finger under her chin while coaxing her to watch, look, see where the ball is going. She stubbornly pushed her jaw downwards touching her chest.I tried again. Huh?! SO I repeated my self and pushed her jaw up.Raising my voice I encouraged her to "Look watch the ball!". Next thing I knew she wasy crying!! Loud sobbing with real tears. I was in SHOCK to say the least and DH came running out of the house like something horrible happened. The only thing we could figure was that I had hurt her feelings. (I felt like pond scum to say the least.) G never cries. let me repeat, G NEVER CRIES. I can get onto her, she can fall with a good thump, skin her knees. She just sucks it up and acts like she has no feeling. ( I know if I counted it would be a total of MAYBE 5 times that she has fallen and hurt herself bad enough to cry.)
DH was so excited that she really cried over hurt feelings.
Maybe we have hit a huge milestone.......

Sunday was Church in the morning and we hardly paid any attention as we watched her sign to the music. I kept thinking I really needed to learn more words, get the music minister to let me know what we were singing that week to learn the signs in advance or find SOMEONE that could interpret for us. I know that she wont know the signs they are using but she learns so quickly and is trying so hard! They were singing and she was signing "Jesus Jesus, Hat hat hat..... baby, baby, Jesus....."You get the picture. too cute.( The hat part.... I had knit her a hat that she was proudly wearing.) I signed as many of the words as I knew, maybe every 5th or 6th word. sigh. I was embarassed to learn after service that a friend happened to be there that interprets and was watching. I mentioned to her that I was wishing she was there to sign for us...... After service we had a crowd around us again. A sweet little one was so excited to see Grace begged DH to put G down so she could play with her. I wish so badly that I had my camera with me. Two little ones playing ring around the rosie at the base of the HUGE Christmon tree in the foyer. I welled up with tears as others smiled and watched. She ended up "talking someone out of a cookie". Promptly started eating it as we made our way to the car... I could hear her over P's shoulder, "nummie nummie nummie....."
Had the older children home for SUnday night supper again. daughter surprised us with desert. We watched Extreme home makeover.... it was finally the reveal of the house in Pensacola. Daughter was blessed to be able to help with the sewing projects in the girls room. She is proud of her blue shirt. They were actually having to turn people away because so many from the community showed up to help.

I was thinking I might have to make a list of things I am thankful for.....
I didnt get it typed out over Thanksgiving Holiday.
Maybe it would be okay to regress...

I remain,
Under His wings,
Anna

Lazy Monday

Nice lazy day.
Hubby home sick.
Just saying a prayer that Miss G doesnt get it.
I know that she will end up coming down with Flus and viruses.
But I just wish not...
We had the kids home last night for Sunday evening supper and P fried a turkey, I made potatoes and green bean casserole..... the finale was Betty Crocker recipe for Apple Crisp. My "go-to desert". P made homemade whipped cream to top it all off.

So tonight I am making this. I hope it sits well with P's tummy.

Im making little G a Santa Baby hat from a Ravelry pattern..... cant wait to see how it comes out..... then to make baby cocoon to look like maybe a santa bag and an infant Santa Baby hat to go with it for my Friend. I got a little distracted.... was going to knit the cocoon and knew little G had to have the hat. I have two cocoons knit up, need to get buttons on one......
She begged all Sunday morning for a hat to wear.....
she is definately a hat person.
I will be happy to oblige her....
Cocoon
Februrary beret. A pattern I made using Elizabeth Zimmermans gull pattern.
Baby sweater and hat


I remain,
Under His wings,
Anna

self control.....

Missy at "its almost naptime" posted this link.
I am glad I took the time to listen to the whole message.

Quotes from Josh Harris' message on Proverbs.


"Proverbs 24:30-31 Josh version...." a little web surfing, a little facebook, a little folding of the hands around my smart phone...... leading to spiritual poverty.

Where do I need to grow in self control???

"This is a newer area of our life and one maybe we havent given much thought and attention to. The world is at a rapid pace developing new ways to fuel our lack of self control and waste our time. WE need to be busy about deveoping new ways to be self controlled and rest in God."

A good read,
a good message.
My commitment to only spend
one hour
per weekday.
Yeah.
Um.
Not doing so good on that one.

I am so thankful.......
for a Patient God,
that offers forgiveness
not just once.....
that allows us to wander back
ready to try again.
I waited too long to be a mother again
I have to many gifts
and talents
My house aint clean enough
to spend more than an hour
per
weekday.
Its the whole truth
and nothing but the truth.
Thanks Missy for sharing.

I remain,
Under His wings,
Anna