Thursday, December 16, 2010

A good day... and some randomness

G and I went out with my Oldest daughter.
It was a beautiful day.
Started out just looking for a local that makes beautiful wood crafts.
Ended up at the Antique store and had a beautiful time.(they had handmade wooden cypress swings hanging outside) I dont know wht it is about antique shoppes but this just really hit "that spot".

Picked up son and made gingerbread cookies and iced them for Daughters students. (student teaching)

Got a bit of knitting done between batches.

Finished reading a great book I'm reviewing last night.......

Knit some more, the pattern changed and I realized I was off count and would have to rip all I had knit that hour. Put knitting down and went to bed. It was 2am so probably a good thing.

Been in a funk.( Making mental note to self to remember to take all the extra vitamins in the cabinet.) I think some of our experiences have really done something to my heart. Please forgive me if I am letting you down...... trying to figure out who I am.... still..... trying to sort out how you travel thousands of miles away and live a completely different lifestyle for two months, come home with a new daughter and remain the same person you were. I get the fact that I am probably not supposed to be "her " anymore. But I have to figure out how to be "me". We always kept Christmas low key. We had a real hard financial time and realized some great things. But this year it feels even more "different"....

I got to the post office with daughter yesterday. Had been on my to-do list for two weeks.... to mail my mother my old cell, she dropped hers while shutting tailgate of the truck......crunch..... needless to say.... no cell phone.......was thankful after a half hour standing in line that I had 11 stamps in my wallet, because the card machine was broken and the reason for the wait. God is so faithful......

So Im just wondering.....

Did I loose two months of my life?
The calendar still reads November on the fridge(write on wipe off one)
The one on the wall is still showing June (thats when we flew to Ecuador)
Is that why my Brain feels like I am stuck somewhere else.
Did I expect things to stop without me and pick back up when I got home.....
I am going through the motions and just not getting where I need to be.

I have been getting alot of pleasure out of my knitting.

I was watching G eat her cereal with her red and green plaid pjs on and thought to self. I bought those after season in Jan of 2008 for Dec of 2009...... just knew shed be home by then. My heart smiled to see the little bare feet swinging uner the table. Her Gymboree things in 3T still fit. I pulled the tags off the winter stuff that we didnt take to Ecuador........ enjoyed seeing her wearing the cute things that waited so long in the closet.... amazed they fit. She is saying so much and signing like crazy........ I want to video her signing a song...... mind boggling.
where we were.......
where we are......

On another note.
Recieved a phone call Monday.
Ive been asked to Mentor a youg lady in the foster care system that was recently released from detention. She has an interest in Art. I accepted the offer and will meet her after the first of the year.

In laws called yesterday and wont be coming on Monday for Christmas.
He is too sick to travel..... sigh....

Off to knit.
well un-knit.
THEN knit.


  1. I enjoyed this a peek into your brain. :) I would imagine you are feeling a tad out of sorts with all you've been through. Maybe some postpartum depression...adoption style? Give yourself some time to find the new "you" in there!

  2. Honesty is best. Your life gets turned upside down....and there is a lot to figure out. Don't beat yourself up over it. PRAYING :) Love hearing how little G is doing :)

  3. There is definitely some readjustment time. But I'm certain that the memories from the country stay forever change the way we see the world.

    My calendar in the bedroom is still in November. I don't spend much time there except tip-toeing out with whatever mismatched clothes and underwear are on the dresser so that I don't wake the baby.


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