CRAZY LOVE!

When I saw this post over at Linnys blog I thought it was going to be about Francis Chan's book. Ive read and heard so much about it and I am waiting on my copy. Our youth group is watching the video series and the leader was ordering a few copies of the book..... one for me.

But Linnys post was about actually DOING it.

God provided the finances we needed to adopt our little one. Our church family was SO gracious. I wish there was a way I could know who did what so that I could privately take them aside and make sure they knew just how greatful we are. We have been members of Woodbine United Methodist Church for awhile over 9 years.

Then we waited.
Month after month........
Its been a little over 18 mos.......
it was a long rainy winter.
I cannot tell you how much my brain is appreciating sunshine.
REALLY.
I never lost faith.
I never gave up.
But I tell you what, some of the faith was like God multiplying mine.
I had just this teeny tiny bit and he took it and made it bigger.( I asked the jeweler to hold aside a mustard seed charm for the charm bracelet my 20 yo gave me for Christmas. With a heart engraved "I love you Mom." What 20 year old struggling man does this? I wear it every day. It's already so scratched up, but its loved.) I had the mustard seed and He moved the mountain. More than one actually! Back in mid February this really was a hopeless situation. I knew that the only way for little G to come home was for God to do a miracle.....
or two.......
or three......

Now that we finally got the phone call to fly I am ashamed at the anxiety that is creeping up within. We had tentative travel plans which were staying with a missionary family. We are now entering their busy season and I fear that we will need to make other arrangements last minute to work it out.Thats fine. I know that if he could do what he has already done this will be a breeze. But it does weigh on me.
I had it all set for me to stay in Ecuador when husband had to return home so that I could bond with little one the whole 6-8 weeks. Since she has down syndrome this bonding process will be extremely important. So if you could please keep that in mind. I know God is a God of details and HE has done such an incredible job so far! I may hear back from them and it will all fall into place or the director of the orphanage might allow us to stay in the guesthouse. I almost shudder to mention this because I know that its not common and I would NEVER think it and dont know why Im posting it.......
I have people offering to donate Delta frequent Flyer miles and I need prayer that simple me can figure out the process and do it. And I have been praying that things will work out "just so" so that my 16 year old can go and stay with me the entire trip. But that is just a want and not a need. We will just have to see how many miles it takes for each ticket, how many we have , how much it costs to transfer the miles..... you know.
details.
God knows them.

I am teaching art classes in the DJJ and just so you know that was a blessing. I told them I couldnt teach this year because of our pending adoption. Then I got chosen?! Just God. I will get done this week and get paid just in the nick of time for our trip. CRAZY?! I was also asked to paint the mural in the nursery and Im praying so hard that I can multi task and get it done before we leave. I am paying my daughter to help me with the mural. She helped me with the Dora one in Gs room and we work well together. She found out her workplace was closing for good when school let out. God is faithful! I need help and she needs to pay her bills.

One last prayer need. I have gained a few pounds while being "expectant". SO FRUSTRATING! I usually wont buy clothes in the next size so I am working hard on eating right so that I can get back in my wardrobe. (and concerned that wont happen!) I am not a shopper and I am praying I can find some things at the consignment store to take.(if the weight doesnt come off as fast as it seems to go on!) I will be looking for things that might not wrinkle, pack well and be versatile. I want to look nice and kept but be comfortable since I will be in the floor and on the ground etc playing with our new daughter. I keep eyeing things in Lands End and other brands that I know will hold up and wash/wear well but I wont spend the money while I am heavier than I want to be. Therein lies the problem.

All of this is hard for me to discuss because it is talking about those concerns that I hope will go away and I dont have to voice them. I am praying God has the answers and that He will fix it all! He has done so many miracles that I trust him completely with all my concerns. Telling you so that you can pray for me is difficult. So Im trusting you......... with more hidden things of the heart.

I continue to rest-
Under His wings,
Anna