Monday, August 22, 2011

A lesson learned


Its already Nearing the end of August,
no Im not trying to rush it
it seems like we are closer to the end than the beginning though.
School is starting
backpacks,
paper and glue.
New shoes and uniforms.
gearing up for new lessons and schedules.
Intersecting with faith-lessons.
Not the ones that come by going to school,
1+1=2 and i before e except after c lessons.......
The kind of lessons that we read about in scriptures
we let them sit in our heads
then trickle down into our hearts
slowly.....
for some of us it takes time....
the grace lessons.......
I keep running into it headlong

I have said,"Yes" to facilitating the Tuesday morning women's group
"One thousand gifts"
The first question in the Leaders guide,
"Ann begins by writing about the meaning of her name..."
"...look up the meaning of your name.
Do you know the story of why your parents chose your name?"
When I read the book it didnt really hit me,
when I read the leaders guide? Nope.

I dont know why reading her name Anne
it didnt dawn on me
Anna,
they shared the same meaning.
really?Me?
Anna: Grace
It was there in black and white.
Letters on the page.
How many times a day do I fingerspell that name?
G.R.A.C.E.
How many times do I write in crayon
hand over hand.....
is it really going to be this hard?
That which I wrestle so hard to learn
its even my name
and now my name sake?
How can we share names, I didnt even give birth to her?
Named before I knew her.
Sharing the same name?
Do I need to keep sounding it out?
Feeling it on my lips?
Hearing my own voice repeat it over and over?
slowly, so she can see how the sounds are made
my little song...
"I love Grace..... yes i dooooo."
pressing the "I love you" into her heart so she can feel it.
Is it going to take a lifetime
repeating it over and over.....
the verb action, when spoken
sounds so unfamiliar.
It feels better to have rules
demands to follow
ridgid "to do"
and "how not-to-do" lists.
number four child,
named for us......
that sweet name that fits just perfect on her
yet when I try it on for size......
its too big,
there is too much room.

a lifetime with Grace to learn of a lifetime of grace?
the person-real and tangible
Verb action
intersecting in my life
in an all at once kind of way
not just me teaching her.....
but her
them
teaching me.
It really is all grace.


I remain
Under His wings,
Anna


8 comments:

  1. Indeed it really is all grace. Beautiful.

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  2. This is an amazing post Anna. You are an amazing woman of God. Thank you for sharing!

    New follower,

    Margo

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  3. a lifetime of grace to learn a lifetime of grace...true that...pressing i love you into her chest...what a beautiful message...

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  4. Oh, yes, a lifetime to learn about and live in His grace, and then eternity too - too much to grasp! Lovely to read a glimpse into your heart.

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  5. I saw you over at imperfect prose and wanted to come see you...I loved these thoughts, and the pressing of "I Love You" into her chest...I can "see" God doing that with us!

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  6. This is so absolutely beautiful. I love your love for your precious baby girl. This was perfect.

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  7. anna, you are such a woman of grace. thank you so much for linking.

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  8. grace is a beautiful thing....this is lovely Anna! :-)

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