"If.... then"

Ive just been wishing lately that life was like an "if.... then" consequence chart. When my little ones were growing up we had an "If..... then" consequence chart hanging on the fridge. It was good to have the actions and consequences spelled out for all to see, young and old.
But i am learning that life just doesnt work that way,
SURPRISE!!!!!
You can be the best parent you can possibly be,
eat a certain way,
exercise,
read scripture,
go to church on Sunday,
really live out your faith,
love your children until it physically hurts.
But life will still be life.
That house of cards can come crashing down
leaving a huge mess to clean up.
We are even warned about it in scripture- and yet it still shocks me!
Things happen that werent even on your radar.

The nitty gritty is.....
how you will handle it all.
I am still trying to figure that out.
I keep choosing to be thankful,
I keep choosing healthy thoughts,
I keep choosing love.
But my throat aches,
the tears are many,
and Ive been eating alot of Pepcid
and drinking Mylanta.
Dont see me as weak because I hurt,
because I grieve,
I am trying to be transparent.
I am trying to really walk the walk etc.
But I still am made of flesh.
Im trying to live grace.......
it just doesnt come naturally
and thats where Christ comes in.