I am sitting on my couch in my home
after a nights rest in my bed
the right amount of blankets in my flannel jammies
and the temp just like I like it.
Lil G is playing in her room with her toys
after eating her cereal in a zip top bag
while watching 2 Sesame Streets
and two cups of juice
(while I sipped my coffee, read my Bible, then checked blog land)
after sleeping in her bed with her soft sheets and just right blanket
new birthday doll tucked in beside her.
adorable photo here)
As I savor it all
the Thankful or FULL-of-thanks
for the routine
no more yelling "NOOO!"
because it all felt so wrong.
she was able to do it
(whereas I could not)
the deep yearning for it to all be right
even in the wrong.
How being without
makes us full-of-thanks for what is.
Changes in perspective,hearing just the right words to remind me
that even though none.of.this.is what I expected,
no matter what the yearning deep in my soul
for all to be made right.
It just wont be,
not on this side of heaven.
not the trips we plan
and "happily ever afters" we are promised (by media and society)
because there will be forgotten cameras
and expectations that go unmet
(and ones that cannot be met)
and we are all human
no matter how much we love the Lord
or claim the cause of Christ......
our humanness continually reminding us of the need for grace.
leading into Advent.....
That is what the Prophets were begging for- Isiah 64:9
They were begging God to fix it
"dont you see whats going on all around us?"
(sickness, joblessness, orphans, disease,strife)
"Please come. Come fix it!"
They actually gave voice to it.
Yet, when he came it wasnt how they thought it would look
If Im not walking around with the correct perspective I just might miss it
I might be looking at all thats wrong
and not focusing on God-in-it-all.
Isnt this the CUTEST
birthday photo EVER!!!!)
I am full of thanks
family that understands-
that makes a home- made birthday cake
hearing the "happy birthday song"
echoing off the walls
while lil G embraced the moment
and did her best to even sing along
unabashedly- because it was hers
and kept on trying to blow the candles out.
Each of us, internally wanting to help......
big brothers with fierce love hoping the next try would do it.
Family that could enjoy the grace filled moments
until it overflowed....
that I could hear her unspoken words through the screamed "NOO!"
(I was telling her about presents while she was eating her cake.)
She was happily eating,screaming no, and signing cake.
That night in bed it clicked.(it takes me awhile)
Maybe she was saying"let me savor the moment. "
"Stop talking about presents!"
This is the moment to savor the cake.
The cake with the rainbow.
that was made with me in mind.
I can eat it all by myself
and let it take as long as I need to savor each crumb.
not looking towards what is next.
savoring the now.
(One more time
Imagine this photo really
bringing tears to your eyes
cuz Lil G is just so adorable!)
Thanksgiving and Advent(the four weeks leading up to Christmas)
because in being human
it is all grace
Under His wings,
(maybe, just maybe tomorrow we will have some great cell phone pics
to go with another incredible post! wink wink)