A year ago today- June 8th

I remember Waking up
feeling excited,
like a child on Christmas Day.
We were meeting with Maria Jose at 9am. We were up early and showered, went downstairs for breakfast with the Cruz family. Sandra had come to the airport with Caryl, our apt mate, so I know she was tired, starting her morning well before we did I am sure. Each morning she had coffee, fresh fruit and bread from the market and fresh juice that she squeezed for everyone. She had breakfast ready for her three children, husband, Caryl and us each day. I dont know where she found the energy. I could see in their eyes how much they enjoyed teaching us about new foods and flavors. Showing us what the fruit looked like and how she prepared the juice. I wanted to spend time in her kitchen learning how to prepare the foods we loved so much.
But that wasnt why we were in Ecuador was it?
Maria Jose Was late.
We ended up getting to the orphanage much later than expected. I remember watching all the concrete block homes and businesses whiz by as we made our way to the orphanage. The sights and smells so unlike what home is like.We arrived at the orphanage and sat down in a meeting room with a few of the women that oversee things. As we were going over papers, broken English and broken Spanish being spoken..... Paul whispers,"shes outside on the swing set." He is able to see little G outside playing with some of the other children. I wondered if they were taking her out to use up some of the excited energy or did she even know/understand what was going to happen that day. (I wasnt able to see her and didnt want to be rude about it. Once we were done talking business the children had already gone inside.)
This is what we saw when we stood at the door waiting to see her for the first time. My stomach was in knots.
I am not joking when I tell you she jumped into papas arms. It was love at first sight.
The psychologist was there for us every step of the way. Here she is explaining to little G that this is her family. These are the same people in the pictures that we have been telling you about. They are real.


Little G is showing us her room and her little bed.

We play outside.....




We play inside



Grace is wearing a dress I had made for her the previous year.We were able to send it to Ecuador with someone else traveling there along with a few gifts. It was just like God that the clothing I had sewed and purchased a year earlier fit perfectly.
Go figure.
We had pizza for lunch together. We still joke about one of our first meals in Ecuador was take out pizza.
We went back to our apartment for a siesta.
I clearly remember how hard it was to leave her with promises that we would be back.
Little G had no language, she played simple "repeat after me" type clapping games.
What did she understand?
can you see the harsh set to her features?

If I was completely honest with everyone I will tell you that I laid in bed that night with my head spinning and a terror that she might never tell me she loved me, she might sit in a corner rocking as the years pass by. I thought I had been prepared but the reality was scary. I didnt even tell papa how scared I was. I kept pushing those thoughts deep deep in my head trying not to let them sink into my heart.
God loves us.
He loves little G and she needed a family.
That was all that mattered.
I took each thought and gave it back to God.

Today, a year into our story with Little G I have gone through the grief, anger and depression that comes with hard realities and tell you that God remains faithful. God is good. I know that even if she hadnt made the progress that she has made I would still be repeating these same things. I am thankful that when the going got tough we didnt walk away. We had the faith of a mustard seed. After all the waiting and grief it was a reality and God still had work to do, in me. This adoption was not just about little G. She was the carrot God dangled before my nose to take me on a journey that I would not have taken knowing the tears and emotions that I would endure. I am human and this is the truth. I wanted the easy path. Sign on the dotted line and you have a little 3 year old in 3 months. If youve been reading my posts you will see that since this day one year ago little G has learned so so much. She is running jumping and signing like crazy.(250-300 ASL signs!) She is becoming more verbal, just now she brought me her cup and clear as a bell said,"more milk." no signing needed.
God is good.
No matter what.
God is faithful.
Even when we are human.....
so very very human.

Under His wings,
Anna